So I ran my Tinkerbell 10k! It was a goal I set for myself months ago and to be honest, I am surprised that I actually pulled it off. Here is my sparkly medal and overpriced commemorative pin:
There are running blogs out there that detail race experiences. I used to think those were ridiculous because…who would find someone else’s exercise experience interesting? Having completed my very first official race though, I sort of understand. It is kind of like reading concert reviews after you’ve attended or reading reviews of books/movies/shows you love – you relive the thrill of this unusual and surprisingly fun experience from someone else’s perspective. As for me, I just want to memorialize the fact that it was raining and we woke up at 4 fucking am and our Uber driver got lost, circling around the park but getting rerouted back to the Disneyland $18 parking lot each time. I stayed with my brother in a slower start group and nervously couldn’t understand why the race didn’t start at 5:30am on the dot. But we started and we ran! And we ran pretty well, all things considered. My finish time was about 1 hour and 20 minutes, which was slower than expected but we DID stop to take pictures multiple times.
I haven’t been blogging recently because I’ve been feeling really down. Autism is relentless; we have therapy every single day, back to back, and then have to deal with the usual stresses of raising a toddler with social/communication delays. And it isn’t as though my emotional state gets to take a break when my son is napping or when we are finished for the day. People often talk about compartmentalization as a survival skills and I can understand why now: the worry and sadness seeps into every crack of the day. Thank god for my new therapist because I am learning quickly how to deal with it.
But after the race, I realized that it is more important than ever to stick with this blog. It felt really satisfying to have made a goal, months in the past, and see it to completion (on Mother’s Day weekend too).